I believe, strongly, in fate. When my mother got pregnant at twenty years old, it wasn't teenage indiscretion, it was fate (I was born). When some asshole kicked a soccer ball directly into my face, it wasn't his own inability to aim properly, it was fate (I couldn't be a soccer player). When I didn't I have enough money to go to New York for the summer, it wasn't ridiculous pricing, it was fate (New York would have me later in life). I believe that universal forces guide us in our intended directions, whether or not we're consciously aware of this subliminal guidance. I believe that despite our own free will, we cannot miss our fate, one way or another, it will befall us.
It is easy, though, to profess belief in all these divine concepts; it is not easy, however, to realize what you want and what is meant are not the same paths. Fate is a funny, cruel trick; we are taught that we will meet one person and we will know and then, we will love them forever. However, somewhere between life, family, friends, school, jobs, games, lies, disagreements, and passion, this fate proves to be a difficult conquest. You meet people, you get to know them, you make decisions, you form ideas, you care for them, it works, it falls apart, it is just another stepping stone, another brick in your wall, another learning experience.
What happens though, when you meet someone who you think is more than a stepping stone, when you meet someone who moves your soul, who broadens your heart, who affects your every thought...what happens when your love for them is not enough to hold them in your life...what happens when the universe has other plans for your life, plans you don't know if you want.
You breathe. You stop thinking, considering, imagining, reliving, regretting. You inhale and then, you exhale. You let go, you let air and life and water and love back into your system. You stop fighting the inevitable, you just float.
They tell you that it will feel better, they promise this. They tell you everything happens for a reason, that what is meant to be, will be. I don't know if these things are true, but I believe them when they tell me. I believe that I have a path already mapped out, I just have to find my way along it. I believe that I am doing the right thing, no matter how hard it is, no matter how bad it hurts.
I believe that in some place, maybe another world, maybe another time, there is a you and there is a me, and they last and last and last, going on loving eachother better than anyone else could, happily unaffected by outside forces. Whenever I find a snowglobe, I will look for us inside. Until then, I'm just going to keep breathing.