Saturday, July 26, 2014

For my meemsy.

My darling angel mother Marybell (as many mistakenly call her) invited me to answer some questions as part of a Blog Tour she is doing. I am not going to pretend to know or understand what is happening or what this entails because I really don't. I am going to answer these four difficult (SO DIFFICULT) questions because I love my mom and she asked me to and sometimes I like to give people what they ask for. In reality, I am just inviting you into the barrage of bullshit that is my life, so have a great peek behind the curtain, it is rare and alarming and will give you something to gossip to your palz about or maybe--just maybe--what's behind my curtain will make you feel better about what's behind yours.

1. What am I working on?

I am working on this lengthy, confusing pile of insanity that I sometimes, when feeling confident, refer to as a novel. I don't like to announce that in public because than people feel welcome to say asinine things like, "So hows your novel coming?" which, on the wrong day, at the wrong time, could send me into orbit. Its some angsty, twenty something, science fiction. I don't know what I am going to do with it, I just know I like writing it. I also have two running poetry documents that I have been adding to a lot lately, one theme is 'how I feel today' and the other is looooooooove--SURPRISE. So I suppose until I have a million papers to write come the fall, that is what I'm working on. :)

2. How does my work differ from others of it's genre?

It is mine, so it sounds like me and not someone else. Also, I probably say fuck more.

3. Why do I write/create what I do?

I don't talk excessively, I would say I spend more time listening and observing, and that is because I write. I write because that's how I understand the world, as my mother said, that's how I process things. I am always writing, especially in my head. If you read my notepad on my phone you would feel like you were reading a diary or some weird quote book. Some people say that writer's watch and remember everything rather than experience everything, but I would say that writing helps to make things real for me. Sometimes I worry that if I don't write something down it will disappear and become more of a dream than a moment. I write what I write, and I always say this, because it is what I am good at.

4. How does your writing/creating process work?

I wouldn't call it a process really, more like shit hitting the fan. Sometimes when I read something that hits me in the right place I get really inspired and could write nonstop for hours but a lot of days it feels like pulling my teeth out with pliers. In that, I just mean that writing can be really agonizing sometimes, especially when you don't know where to go next. I guess I don't really think of writing in a scientific way, there is no method or organization or systematic process to my writing, it is my escape from all of those things. I write because something inside me always wants to, I never hate it. I do sometimes wish that I could've been really good at something that makes for an easier career, but that would probably bore me anyway. For me, writing is just something that is necessary and relaxing, like running or sleeping or alone time. When it comes, it is always exactly what it needs to be that day.

If you couldn't tell, I am not the exceedingly kind, welcoming butterfly that my mother is. I love you, Mary Swan-Bell. Thank you for your invite :)